We've seen them in the gym and called them exercise balls for years. We have even considered switching out our desk chairs for one. Once you become pregnant they are suddenly BIRTH BALLS! These large round items are awesome before, during and after labor. Check out our user guide below for details! We think they are a must for birthing mamas, doulas and childbirth educators. Pack your hospital bag or doula bag and grab one of these and you'll be ready. Use a ball cover to make the ball clean, soft and easy to carry.
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Here are some ideas and tips based on my experience in Seattle:
Know your local hospital policies
Prepare your clients
Consider Going Virtual
At the birth
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Our work brings us in contact with a variety of facilities, care providers and family members whose opinions or practices may not agree with our own. This tension can lead to an “Us” against “Them” attitude. Starting out as a doula, I would often view my job as a battle where I would be taking on unsympathetic policies, doctors, mother-in-laws, etc., on behalf of my client. Over time, I realized I couldn’t be a shield for my clients or keep bad things from happening. I needed my clients to know that this was neither possible nor healthy. If I truly wanted to serve my clients better, I had to build relationships with the team that my client had chosen.
Some of the best ways to build these relationships are:
Promoting teamwork serves our clients and helps us win by creating an environment of collaboration as opposed to confrontation. More practically, if care providers view us as team players, they are more likely to refer us to new clients.
This advice sounds obvious, but can be so easy to ignore, often with the best intentions. I know I’ve been guilty of overstepping, oversharing or giving my opinions without being asked. Do these sound familiar to you?
We’ve all heard the saying, “It’s not your birth.” Don’t try to change your client. Only provide information when it’s appropriate. Wait for your client to ask your opinion, then feel free to share.
Keep in mind, however, that supporting your client’s choices doesn’t mean ignoring your limitations. Many years ago, I had a miserable doula experience with a particular doctor. As a result, I decided that, for at least a year, I needed to pass on any clients that were working with this practice. Your limitation could be that you’re not great at inductions or not comfortable working as a postpartum doula with a mother who doesn’t plan to breastfeed. It’s ok to have limitations as long as you recognize them and refer out to a doula that is going to be better for your client.
Supporting your client’s choices will help you win as a doula because it will boost your client’s satisfaction. An added benefit is that it allows you to meet your clients where they are and release the burden of the consequences of choices that aren’t yours. When doulas feel sole responsibility for providing a good birth experience, the self-doubt and second guessing that comes along with that can lead them to burn out.
Empowering your clients is related to supporting their choices. When thinking about empowering my clients, I love this quote:
Replace the word “Leaders” with “Doulas” and imagine how you can empower your clients by giving them their own authority and power. Your role is facilitator not mouthpiece. For example, if your client’s doctor has discussed induction and your client does not want to induce, you may choose to meet with your client and role-play how she will express her reservations. Maybe provide her with a list of sample questions or point her to research to bolster her argument. Let your client have her own voice so she feels she is making her own choices and is in control of her own birth.
Just as with supporting your client’s choices, empowering your clients helps you win as a doula by increasing client satisfaction and contributing to your longevity as a doula.
If you are a working doula, you will eventually need a backup. One day you will have clients in labor at the same time, or have a family emergency or just get sick. Choose your backup carefully. Consider location, experience, price, availability and familiarity. I also like to make sure that they work in the same style and to the same standard that I do. Regardless of your criteria, it is important that you both take the relationship seriously. Your backups should maintain close communication about their availability and be aware of and respectful of your expectations. On the flip side, when you are a backup, be the backup that you want to have. The backup role is a crucial one and should be treated (and compensated) accordingly.
Having a backup helps you win as a doula by making life on call easier to balance. A good backup can be key to avoiding doula burnout, but only if you actually use them. Don’t miss out on life because you are reluctant to have your backup serve your client. Tell your client how the backup relationship works and offer to let them meet your backups. Managing your client’s expectations up front will make it easier for you to incorporate the effective use of a backup into your life and your practice.
(Click here for more advice on How to Survive Life on Call)
As a runner, I love this phrase. It means make your own choices, or, as my daughter likes to say, “You do you.” This idea particularly resonates when it comes to a topic that I think is important to address: doula bullies. These are the doulas that may judge your choices or pressure you about the way you run your business, from how much you’re going to charge to where you get your certification.
Doula bullying is very real and something I’ve experienced firsthand. You’ll find doula bullies in real life and, more and more, in places like Facebook. I’m here to say that it’s not ok. Walk away from the bullying. Don’t take it in. Push it out. You have the right to doula with your own style, goals and priorities. It is NOT TRUE that there is ONE way to doula. Try things out and change them if you think you’re on the wrong track, but feel free to find your own path. There is plenty of work as a doula. Babies are going to keep being born. Your choices are not taking choices away from other doulas. Everybody has the ability to run their own race.
This is one of my favorite ways to win because when we create a business that works for our style, our family and our goals, then we are developing a business that we love and is sustainable.
]]>To battle burnout, I’ve put together three strategies and a few bonus tips that I’ve used over the years to make this crazy life on call happen. These ideas will not magically transform our work into a nine-to-five job, but they have made my life as a doula more doable and sustainable. There is no one size fits all approach, but, hopefully, you will find some ideas that will help you meet your professional and personal goals.
When you’re on call for a client, it’s usually for a few weeks. Sure, you have their estimated due date, but you don’t really know when you’re going to be needed. When I started out, I thought I could probably only handle one or two clients a month and scheduled accordingly. Even though that’s not THAT many clients, I’d look at my calendar and realize that I would be on call for months at a time.
The strategy of blocking months is exactly what it sounds like. After assessing your schedule, goals and income, you choose a few months out of the year to be your heavy months. The rest of the year, you’re totally off call. For example, I have some doula friends who are preschool teachers and they are off call during the school year and on call during the summer. With this strategy when you’re on call, you’re ON, but the rest of the time you can chill, disconnect and do all those things you can’t do when you’re on call.
Sometimes if you know you’re going to be out of town or have a big event like a birthday or anniversary, you feel like you can’t take a client during that time. Unfortunately, blocking off one day or weekend really amounts to blocking off a four week span because you don’t know when a client will deliver. I hate to hear about doulas missing out on potential work for fear of missing an event.
You’ve heard of blackout days with gift certificates. This idea works the same way. Tell your clients, “Yes I am available that month, but I want you know that I have a few blackout days on which I will have a great backup doula available for you.” Also, let them know that there are probably a couple days of the month that might have an unexpected conflict like a last minute trip or special event. In my experience, most clients are fine with the idea of blackout days as long as they know in advance.
Sometimes it feels uncomfortable to tell people you won’t always be available because you’re afraid you won’t get hired, but you can’t guarantee you will be at a birth. Life gets in the way, and it’s better to set your client’s expectations at the start.
Another strategy that has been on the rise is doula partnerships. Though there are formal permanent doula partnerships that require detailed business and legal planning, I’m focusing here on the idea of a temporary partnership used during those heavy months or months you know you’ll need more flexibility.
Make sure to partner with a doula who shares your style so as to make any transition as seamless as possible for your clients. You and your partner should attend prenatal meetings together. Tell your clients that when the time comes, it could be either you or your partner who will be on call.
The beauty of having a doula partner, as opposed to just a backup, is that your partner will be as familiar and prepared for the client as you are. However, If you choose to explore this option, I would recommend that you take it slow. Test the waters with a couple births to see how the partnership works. Make sure to get the money part of it ironed out in advance. Set up a breakdown where the partner that handles the delivery gets a larger portion of the fee, but the partner who attends the meetings still gets a percentage. I know it can be awkward to talk about money, but I’ve heard so many negative stories from doulas that revolve around compensation. Don’t fall into that trap.
You may think this advice is all good and well but be asking yourself what about the money? Every one of these strategies could mean turning away work, losing a client or sharing fees with another doula. My answer would be that burnout brings in zero income. If your current lifestyle is unsustainable, then you may very well burnout. We are not doula robots. We are actual people with lives and needs, and we should not feel guilty about that. Self care is not a myth. Taking care of ourselves, being kind to ourselves and our families will help with the sustainability of our passion and our profession.
]]>In March of 2005 I began my journey to doula work by attending a DONA birth doula training in Atlanta with the amazing Rae Davies. I was serious about this new career and began the road to certification immediately. I completed all requirements, including attending 5 births in order to get the 3 qualifying births for certification. (2 of my first 5 births were C-section births and only 1 could count towards certification at the time)
In late 2005, I received my DONA certification and began doula work in earnest. I took about 2 -3 clients a month regularly until I became pregnant in late 2006. After a few months, off in 2007, I started up again and continued with the work that I loved. My DONA certification was up for re-certification in 2008 and I completed it as required without any issues. In 2009, I started YourDoulaBag.com and began selling products for doulas. Also in 2009, another pregnancy and birth of my own (baby #4) took me out of doula work for about 4 months. Right about summer of 2010 I was enthusiastically back to a full client load and was busy building my doula products business. At this time, I also created the doula data management program YourDoulaBiz. Doula business was good. I was "all in" as a doula. This was my profession and I embraced it completely. To be honest, I was juggling a lot of balls at this time in my life. Four kids and a start up business was a lot for me to handle and things sometimes slipped through the cracks.
What I didn't do was pay attention to my re-certification date.
By the time, I realized that I had missed my re-certification deadline it was too late. DONA International did not have a policy in place (which I believe they do now) that would allow you to re-certify after you miss your deadline. I had lost my CD(DONA)! You might be wondering how I could have ignored reminders from DONA. Unfortunately, the organization had a few glitches with their notification system and reminder postcards weren’t sent. An email might have gone out, but I didn’t see it.
I wanted my certification back, but found out that the only choice that I had at that point was to go through the entire certification process again…from the very beginning! So, I had to make a choice. Continue to spend my very limited free time growing my business and working as a doula or start back at the beginning of the DONA certification process. I decided to continue on with my work and revisit certification at a later date.
The Time Has Come
Six years and many doula clients later I have decided that now is the time to certify again. I think there is value in certifying as a doula and I realized that there is no time like the present. I ordered by DONA birth doula certification packet and started the certification journey…again.
Training in Louisville (aka #recertroadtrip)
January 15th and 16th I traveled to Louisville, Kentucky to take part in the DONA birth doula training taught by my friend and amazing DONA trainer, Robin Elise Weiss. It was a great trip! I recruited Kathleen Leathers, my doula buddy and SupportingHer collaborator, to join me for the trip. It was a great weekend filled with lots of doula fun. A highlight of the trip included Saturday night dinner with a group of awesome 100percentdoulas from the area. We dinned in the capital city of Franklin, Kentucky and had a wonderful doula dinner.
The Learning Never Stops
While most of what was covered in doula training was very familiar to me, I did learn some new things and it was a nice way to refresh my skills. Meeting the other members of the training was also a highlight of the trip. I loved all the hands-on skills practice that Robin setup in the training and especially enjoyed pretending to be in labor over and over again.
So, I’m one my way back to becoming certified again. If you are a certified doula or planning to get your certification, heed my warning and don't let your certification lapse!
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Cash and Check
Cash and check have long been the typical way that doulas are paid. Have you ever found yourself with a stack of deposit checks sitting on your desk waiting to go to the bank? Many doulas are still collecting payment via check, oftentimes asking clients to mail a deposit check or send a check to complete their payments.
Advantages
Getting paid by cash or check is the most lucrative way to be paid. There are no fees associated with these traditional forms of payments. For many doulas, checks are an easy way to collect payment. There is no learning curve to getting paid by cash or check.
Disadvantages
Cash and check isn’t easy for many of our millennial customers. They aren’t used to paying for bills by check. According to First Data Corporation, more than one fifth of all millennials haven’t paid a bill by writing a physical check. Millennials are active online banking users. Asking our customers to pay by check might cause making a payment a chore. By requiring this method of payment, doulas could appear old fashioned and possibly even unprofessional. We certainly don’t want our request for a check to delay our payment!
PayPal
PayPal is a payment option that is gaining in popularity among doulas. You might find that most of your doula clients have a PayPal account and use this form of payment regularly when they buy items online or sell items on popular sites like eBay. PayPal accounts are linked to a bank account and in order to get access to the funds the account holder has to transfer/withdrawn the funds from their PayPal account to their bank account. This process usually takes 3-5 days, but can vary depending upon your country.
Advantages
PayPal is a popular way for paying for products and services online. The payment site has tools to help businesses accept payments easily. The PayPal account user can quickly create an invoice using the free templates and email clients through the PayPal site. There is also a fun feature called PayPal.me where account holders can create a personal link that makes payment super simple. I created one for my own business that you can see here http://paypal.me/alicethedoula. There is also a very easy to use tool that you can use to add a payment button to your website. This button can be customized in so many ways including adding a price and changing the size of the button. This could be an option for collecting payment directly through your website. Here is a button that I created in less than one minute. It is for a 1 cent payment which goes directly to my PayPal page. (if you find this blog post useful you can press the buy now button and send me a one US cent!)
Disadvantages
When you hear complaints about PayPal they nearly always seem to be about their fees. PayPal charges the seller/service provider 2.9% of the amount paid and an additional 30 cents per transaction. This means is that if you charge $1000 for doula services, $29.30 will be held by PayPal for their fee.
Please take note that it is against the PayPal user agreement to request that your buyer use the “send money to a friend or family member” when they are paying you for services that you have provided. I researched this topic and contacted PayPal directly. The customer service representative confirmed that this is not the correct why to get paid for services using PayPal. You can find all of the details about this part of the user agreement here. Quoting PayPal “You may not use the ‘send money to a friend or family member’ feature in your PayPal account when you are paying for goods and services.” Violating the PayPal user agreement can put you and your buyer at risk for their account being shut down.
Online Payments
There are countless companies that provide a method for accepting online payments. Well known options include Square and Stripe which are the two that I researched for this blog post. Stripe fees are the same as PayPal which is 2.9% of the sales amount and 30 cents per transaction. Square fees are a bit less when you swipe a card than both Stripe and PayPal at 2.75% of the sales amount. If you type in the card number (through your website for example) the fee at Square is a bit higher at 3.5% and a 15 cent per transaction fee.
Advantages
Both Square and Stripe have mobile apps and allow you to easily swipe credit cards on your phone. In addition, adding a payment buttons to your website is almost as easy as adding a PayPal button. I created one below that links to my Stripe account. (feel free to test and send me another penny!) I think an advantage that Stripe has over PayPal is that customers aren’t required to have a PayPal account in order to make a payment. They can pay with debit/credit cards which could include debit cards that are setup for a healthcare flexible spending account.
Disadvantages
The fee is the biggest disadvantage of accepting online payments. Just like PayPal, the service provider is charged a fee for the convenience and protection of online payments.
What’s Next
The world of electronic payments seems to be changing daily. There are a few options in the future that look promising like Google Wallet and Venmo for Business. Until these become a bit easier to use and setup for business account, I think the best option is to look at adding PayPal and either Stripe, Square or a similar online payment processor to your business payment options. Moving beyond the typical cash and check payments will allow your clients to have options that are comfortable to them. The fees might be painful at first, but I think the advantages outweigh the fees. When it comes to tax time, there is a good chance that these fees can be categorized as business expenses. (perhaps this is the silver lining!)
]]>Are electronic signatures valid?
In 2000, the E-SIGN Act (https://www.fdic.gov/regulations/compliance/manual/10/X-3.1.pdf) was passed into a US federal law. This law grants legal recognition to electronic signatures if all parties choose to use electronic signatures. All parties involved must also have access to the final signed version of the documents and the electronic record should be maintained.
The E-SIGN Act act also requires a paper alternative to be available if all parties do not agree to using electronic signatures. For this reason, I suggest that you include a sentence in an email to you client or during in person communication that states “I can provide a paper version of the contract if you would prefer.”
Review of Digital Signing Programs
There are dozens of programs that allow you to get your doula contracts signed. We have selected three that seem the best fit for doula work. These are SignNow, DocuSign and HelloSign.
Available as an Android and iPhone app
Price: App is free and it is free to create an account. The free account allows you to create 5 free documents per month on the app. If you need more than that you can upgrade to a paid account which is $6.99/month or $59.99/year. This is an in app purchase (through iTunes or Google Play). The paid plan allows for unlimited documents. If you want to only create on the desktop version you have to upgrade to the paid plan.
Ease of Use: Very easy to use. I had my contract document in email and saved it right into the SignNow app. Inside the app the process for creating a template is super easy. You go through and add any initial, signature and date fields to your contract document using the very straightforward interface. This process took me about 1 minute to complete. Once the template has been created, you can create a document to send to your clients. This requires that you enter email addresses which you can quickly pull from your phone contacts (if you have stored them there). The contract is sent via email you your clients and you are notified when they have signed the document.
Client experience: Ability to download the contract before and after signing it. Ability to decline to sign, easily see where to sign or initial, dates entered automatically, can draw or type signature, does not require that the client has the app on their phone, can be opened easily
Other interesting features: Login with touch id, create a team so that you can view any team members documents.
Web interface, Android, iPhone and Windows mobile apps
Price: There is a 30 day free trial that does not require a credit card. After the 30 days the least expensive plan is $10/month when paid for the entire year and 14.99/month if paying monthly.
Ease of use: You could login to DocuSign through Facebook, which was can make login very easy. The app sser interface was similar to SignNow, but not quite as easy to use. It was a little confusing as to add the fields for multiple signers (a client and a partner for example). There was a phone notification that the contracts had been signed which some people might prefer over an email notification that the other programs had.
Client Experience: The client screen is a little misleading in that it at first it looks like the user must create an account with DocuSign in order to download the document, but there is a small download icon that could easily be overlooked.
Other interesting features: The company reports that in early 2017 they will integrate payments into there program. If this works well it could be the go to choice.
Web Interface, Android and iPhone version
Price: 3 documents for free each month. After that the smallest plan (pro plan) is $13/month when you pay annually. The Pro Plan allows for unlimited documents per month.
Ease of use: Create an account or login with your Google account. If you login through your Google account you can easily access your Google Drive an all documents stored there. The desktop interface is very user friendly, but I found the app to be difficult to navigate. If you don’t need to create the documents on your phone, then this could be a great choice.
Client Experience: The client interface is very easy, but the process for the client to download a copy is a multi-step process. They have to sign the document, wait for an email, click on a button to go to HelloSign and then from there download the document.
Getting Started with Electronic Signatures
As you can see, integrating electronic signature can be super easy when you use a tool that has been created for this process. If you are ready to update your business in this way
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If you have ever supported a client with a OP baby and felt the frustration of not really know what would help encourage the baby to rotate, then you probably would jump at the chance to learn something that would make a difference. When Tammy Ryan planned to come to my area and teach a Spinning Babies Workshop I was thrilled and excited about learning.
On Saturday August 20th, 2016, the fellowship hall of a church just north of Atlanta was filled with women gathered to learn Spinning Babies techniques. Everyone was ready to go and ready to learn.
Who was there?
One of the things that I loved best about the class was the mix of attendees. The class brought together all types of providers that work with pregnant women. The majority of us were doulas, but there were also certified nurse midwives, certified professional midwives, labor and delivery nurses, chiropractors, massage therapist and childbirth educators. I have never been in a training with such a variety of birth professionals and we were all in the same role that day. We were all learners and this felt so good.
What was covered?
The first half of the class was devoted to anatomy, fetal positioning and pregnancy. We learned a lot about the pelvis, ligaments and muscles related to pregnancy. It was a lot of information, but Tammy kept my attention. Before our break for lunch we learned about belly mapping and about daily pregnancy that can be done to encourage optimal fetal positioning.
We were up and moving around for the second half of the class. This time was devoted to learning about fetal positioning in labor and birth. We learned several different movement and positioning techniques along with when to use each. We took turns practicing with each of us taking a turn playing the role of the pregnant women.
Doula's Scope of Practice
Tammy did a nice job of covering the doula's scope of practice and how spinning babies techniques relates. The room was filled with many birth doulas and this is a topic that I feel is very important to cover. She reminded doulas how to determine if anything is out of scope. While this didn't apply to everyone there, it can't hurt for all providers to hear about the doula's scope.
Summary
The opportunity to learn these skills in person and with my own hands was invaluable. This type of information is so difficult to really understand unless you have someone show you in person. I'll admit that in the past I have been frustrated with the Spinning Babies website. I knew there was so much good information on the site, but I just couldn't quite figure out how to reach it (or understand it well for that matter). I think these techniques are difficult to learn in a virtual environment. Now that I have completed the workshop, I feel great knowing that I have more 'tools' to bring to my doula practice.
I recommend the Spinning Babies Workshop to all birth workers. Attendees will come away with more knowledge about fetal positioning and some real practical ideas for working with your clients.
Workshops are held all over the world! Check out the site for a full schedule or bring one to your area.
Sneak a Peek into the Workshop
Tammy gave me permission to post some videos on Facebook Live during the workshop. I think this is a nice way to take a sneak peek at the class.
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Example of hiring decision questions: "What is your backup situation?" and "When do you meet us in labor?"
Examples of immediate need questions: "Is my hospital natural birth friendly?" or "Do you have a childbirth class that you recommend?"
Examples of questions that I suggest saving for he prenatal include: "How will I know when it is time to go to the hospital?" and "what positions would you suggest for back labor? "
The interview should be used to find out if you are a good match. It's the time to make sure that they know the great skills and qualities that make you unique. Use that limited time to ask them questions. You are interviewing them just as much as they are interviewing you!
Mistake 2: Bash their choice of care provider or birthing location
Many times I have received an inquiry from a potential client who was upset about a phone call or interview that they had with another potential doula. The other doula openly criticized the client’s choice of care provider and/or hospital and told the potential client that they would have a negative birth experience if they stayed with those choices. The first time I heard about this I was shocked and I thought it was a one-time occurrence. This actually is fairly common! Bashing someone else's choices isn't empowering. As doulas we need to honor their choices. If they ask opinion about their choices we can give input. If they aren't aware of challenges that come with their choices was can let them know, but not at the interview unless we are asked for our input. Doulas are there to support clients, not show our bias or force clients to birth with our favorite providers or favorite birthing locations. If you know that you don't like working with their choice of birthing location or care provider tell them that you aren't the best fit for them. Allow them to work with a doula that would feel comfortable supporting them where they are at. And please don't agree to be their doula with the intention of changing their mind during the prenatal.
Mistake 3: You don't interview them
When I first started out I was very eager to get clients. If they wanted to interview me, then I wanted to be their doula. I was ready to go and wanted to work with everyone. I would ignore red flags and not listen to my gut. This was a mistake that is one of my top 5 lessons learned in my first 10 years of doula work. Don't look past red flags during an interview. Doulas should be interviewing the potential clients just as much as the clients are interviewing doula. Make a list of questions for clients and bring them to the interview. This is an important step and also shows the potential clients that you are taking this relationship seriously.
]]>I started out with a very disorganized system. Mine began with a series of spreadsheets and a few paper files. The spreadsheets were cumbersome and didn't allow me to access my data when I was out of the office. If I forgot a client's address on the way to her house I was out of luck. Keeping up with paper birth records and contract was also not my strength and soon were lost in a pile 'to sort'. My system was a wreck. However in the past few years, I've perfected my own system and would like to share my thoughts on how to achieve nirvana with your doula data.
7 Steps to Doula Data Nirvana
1.Organized Plan
2.Easy to enter
3.Easy to retrieve
4.Keeping the right pieces of data
5.NOT keeping non-essential data
6.Keeping data safe
7.Keeping data secure
It is very important to realize that your data management system is only as good as the data that you put into it. A system must be used in order to work. Many people fail with this important step. They get something setup and then they don’t integrate it into their daily work. The result is a failed system. Please don’t make this mistake. I highly recommend taking the time and making an effort to make your data management system into a business habit.
Once you have a system that you have worked with for a while, I recommend periodically evaluating it. Ask yourself these 3 questions:
1) Are you tracking information that isn't needed?
2) Is there information that you are missing?
3) Can you access your data easily?
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Each section of this map is clickable. Pop around and take a look at the offerings. What are we missing? What is needed to help you in your work? Please post in the comments.
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1) Avoid negative doula relationships
I hear about doula drama a lot. There is often talk about "this doula did this" or "that doula isn't doing this right" or "can you believe she is charging that". Conversations like this are not productive and can even be hurtful to you or other doulas. This drama is common in many areas of the country. It is real and you can often feel like you can't get away from it.
After a few negative experiences with doula drama, I made a change. I removed myself from the situation. This means that I left several doula Facebook groups and avoided in person meetings that I knew were likely to end up with negative discussions and gossip. The result was more free time (less time in Facebook) and a reduction of negativity. In my life I choose to surround myself with positive people and this includes the doulas that I network with as well. If you can't find positive doulas that will lift you up, inspire and support you locally go online. LESSON LEARNED! Be selective in your doula relationships and avoid those which are negative.
2) Ace the Interview
The interview process is so important. It is a great time for potential clients to get to know you and for you to get to know the potential clients. I know many doulas have moved to phone interviews, but I still require an in-person interview. In the last blog, I mentioned that it is important to not ignore red flags and many of these pop-up at the interview. I can't properly assess the fit with potential clients over the phone and have had a few less than ideal situations as a result..
If I determine that the client is a good fit for me then I really want to ace the interview. I want to leave confident that I presented my best self during the one hour that we had together. But this wasn't always easy for me. It required that I prepare what I was going to say and even practice out loud or with a friend. Putting time and effort into the small elements of the interview like wardrobe and meeting location were also key components to an awesome interview. LESSON LEARNED! Work at your interview skills and process and more clients will be hiring you after the interview.
3) Sometimes I'm Just Plain Wrong
I've attended around 250 births and one would think that I pretty much know how birth works. I've seen a lot and am pretty good at accessing things like 1) how far along my client is or 2) if my client is in transition and finally 3) if it's a good time to go to the hospital. But, just as I start to get this 'know-it-all' attitude I'll have a client that completely surprises me. One that I am sure is in transition and yet she is only at 1cm. Or a client that seems like she is ready to push and yet is 4cm. Or one that is surely in early labor when in fact she is about to push. LESSON LEARNED! Sometimes I am just plain wrong. Labor is different for every woman and even differs from pregnancy to pregnancy. Things aren't always what they seem. Now I like to tell my clients that I know a lot about labor, but there are times when I'm wrong. I might suggest that we go to the hospital and come to find out it is too early. What I can guarantee my clients is that I do my best, not that my best is always right.
4) The Doula-Partner Relationship Can Be Magical
When I started this work I had NO idea how much I would love working with partners. I knew the value of a doula to partners. I also knew that doulas in no way take the place of partners. I just didn't expect that the relationship between a doula and a partner can be magical. By magical I mean the ability to work together to meet all of the needs of a laboring mother sometimes without even talking. So many times I have quickly developed a relationship with a partner and there becomes a seamless division of duties. It is almost as if we are reading each others minds! When doulas and partners work well together the support is amazing. All members of the birthing team are working at their optimal level. I love this experience. LESSON LEARNED! An incredible working relationship can be formed with partners that can be truly extraordinary.
I have such a passion for the doula-partner relationship that I created a handout for my clients and offer it to all doulas. If you are interested...you can purchase the regular version or get one customized with your company logo.
5) Invest in Your Education...Wisely
I am firm believer that we should all continue to learn and grow. The world of birth work is constantly changing and it is important to keep up to date. I think we should all be continual learners! Two ways that I like to grow and learn is through continuing education programs and reading. I love to learn through both in-person and online training. I have enjoyed advanced doula training for learning more about the Rebozo and have learned a ton about Facebook Ads through an online course. I also highly recommend and personally enjoy the educational opportunities available when attending conferences. Conferences are a great way to learn a lot in a short time. This style suits me well because when I travel for a conference I can devote time and energy to learning and not have the start and stop routine that happens when I have the distractions of work family and life on call. {I'll be at the DONA International Conference this July in Seattle and the Lamaze International Conference in West Palm Beach in October} I have also learned that I need to actually put time and effort into my learning. If I purchase an online course for example I need to complete it! If I attend a conference I need to pay attention in the sessions and take notes. LESSON LEARNED! Investing in education is important and putting time AND effort into it is just as important.
One education program that I am passionate about is the doula business training program that I created. This program is called 100percentdoula and is open a few times a year for new members.
Share a lesson that you have learned in the comment section!
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1) The Backup Doula Relationship is Important
We like to think that we will never need to call our backup doula...but, eventually you will. I usually call in my backup or serve as a backup a couple of times a year. Because of this real need, I have found 3 doulas to serve as backups for me. They are doulas that I can completely count on. When I select a doula for my backup I look for someone who practices similarly to me, is extremely dependable and keeps in communication.
A few years ago, I had a couple that wanted me to use their childbirth educator as my backup. This is usually a nice idea since the couple already has a relationship with this person. I spoke to the doula and she agreed to be my backup. As it turned out, I needed her at 3 am when I was already at a labor when this other couple also went into labor. Much to my surprise, the backup doula said ‘No’. She said that she wasn’t feeling well and that she also had a client that might go into labor and that she couldn’t go to the birth. She had not been in communication about her being sick or about her other client that was due. After a mini freak out, I had to desperately call other doulas and beg them to help me. LESSON LEARNED! The backup relationship is important and don’t risk it with someone that you don’t know and trust. After this situation occurred, I had my attorney (and husband) create a Backup Contract which details out the relationship and makes me feel more prepared.
When I was a new doula, I wanted every client that interviewed me to choose me as their doula. If they wanted me then I wanted them. This usually worked out, until it didn’t. I completely ignored my gut feeling and accepted a client that didn’t seem like a good fit. I can’t really define exactly what didn’t feel right, but there was several red flags waving in my face that I ignored. The doula relationship didn’t go well. It was my fault because I should have said no. I wasn’t the right doula for them even though they thought that I was. LESSON LEARNED! Just because someone wants to hire me doesn’t mean that I should take them as a client. Now I pay attention to my intuition. If a relationship doesn’t feel right then I suggest another doula. This is best for the clients and for me.
3) Data MattersWhen I started out I had an amazing ability to remember my clients and their births. I could recall details and give out numbers like an encyclopedia. I am not sure when, but eventually I hit a wall. I could no longer remember the births! I didn’t know if I had attended 18 or 21 births. Everything started running together and I realized that I didn’t have a system to collect my data and keep it organized.
To be fair, I had few systems but none was used routinely and therefore, none were up to date. Then I experienced a few tax seasons where I had no clue about my expenses and mileage driven. LESSON LEARNED! Data matters and I needed a system to keep it organized. At this point, I developed the system that went on to become YourDoulaBiz. YourDoulaBiz is a web based data management system that I created to easily keep my doula data organized. Once I had an organized system (that I used on a regular basis) my business grew. I had an organized history that I could pull numbers from for interviews. I knew exactly where my client data could be found. It changed my career.
4) Repeats Rock
It usually takes a couple of years for your first clients to have the opportunity to become repeat clients. I absolutely love when I hear from a previous client asking me to be their doula again. It is the best. Working with a client a second, third or fourth time is amazing. {Yes, I’ve had 2 clients where I have been their doula 4 times} The relationship is already solid. You don’t have to learn about their previous birth experience because you were there. You are already part of the team. I also love to be there when a client has a smooth and quick second birth when they had experienced a long and difficult first birth. That is a magical moment for me! It is a true joy to be in a phase in my career when half (or more) of my clients are repeats. LESSON LEARNED! Repeat clients are amazing. A positive birthing experience will likely lead to another positive birth experience.
5)Talk to Clients About VisitorsEven as a new doula I would ask my clients about their plans for having visitors at their labor and/or birth. But as a new doula, I didn’t really discuss what this meant. I would just make a note of who would be there and go on to my next topic. Then there was the time that I had a very negative experience with a grandmother to be. My client’s mother wanted to be at her daughter’s birth, but the grandmother-to-be wasn’t made aware of the couples desires for birth. When I showed up at the labor and the word got out that they wanted an unmedicated birth, the grandmother-to-be was furious. She made the couple aware that she did not agree with their decision. It was extremely uncomfortable for all of us. The grandmother-to-be actually grabbed my arm when just after I closed the hospital bathroom door {where the couple wanted to labor alone} and accused me of “making them go unmedicated”. It was a nightmare. LESSON LEARNED! Now at a prenatal I cover this topic in detail. I even created a handout about Visitors at Your Birth that includes a test for potential visitors. I want my clients to make sure that they are aware of the possible problems that visitors cause if they are not completely supportive of the process. A laboring woman doesn’t need frowning faces and visitors saying things like “Oh honey, you’ve been in labor a long time”.
Share a lesson that you have learned in the comment section!
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Goal Setting - What my process looks like
My first year of goal setting looked a lot like dreaming. I was more focused on big dreams and less focused on the steps to get there. Since then, I have refined my goal setting process. I am now better at setting smaller goals. When those smaller goals are achieved the bigger goals are next on the list!
2016 is the fourth year that I have used Leonie Dawson's Create Your Shining Year Workbooks as the primary tool in my goal setting process. I love the workbooks so much that I am an affiliate** for the product. As an affiliate, I promote the product because I use it myself and believe it.
I'll admit, the first year I purchased the workbooks I didn't really fill it out. I went through and filled out the easy pages, then put it on my shelf and went about my day to day tasks. About halfway through the year I pulled the workbook out and was disappointed that I didn't fill the whole thing out. The second year, I was much better at filling it out, but didn't check back in with it that often. Last year I got it right! I scheduled time into my calendar to fill out the workbook (several 2 hours sessions over a few weeks). Then I scheduled more time to review the workbook on a regular basis throughout the year. HOORAY! This made such a change in my business.
In case you were wondering...just buying the workbooks doesn't actual make real change in your business! You have to put in the time and effort.
New for 2016 - Goal Setting Webinars
I heard from many doulas that they love the Create Your Shining Year workbooks too so I thought it would be fun to set goals together. Everyone that purchases a workbook through my affiliate link will be invited to 3 goal setting webinars that will take place between late December and mid-January.
How do you do it? I love hearing about how everyone sets goals. If you have a goal setting routine please share with a comment. Maybe you don't have a goal setting routine yet. That's okay too! Consider grabbing a workbook and joining me for the free goal setting webinars. It will be a great jump start on this important process.
** as an affiliate I receive a portion of all sales that I refer through the links on this page and in the video
]]>4 Ways in which a doula can help their clients find their voice and use it
1) Prenatal Preparation – Finding their Voice
Most doulas meet with their clients before labor one of more times to really determine how best they can help mom and her partner during labor and birth. During these prenatal appointments, the topics that are often discussed include birthing preferences, fears and strategies for the big day. This is a great time for mom and her partner to define their voice. They can determine their top priorities and figure out how they can best communicate this information to their providers. This is a great time to identify questions and topics that should really be discussed prior to labor. During prenatal appointments, doulas can help point out questions that should be asked in the office prior to labor. Mom and her partner can practice finding their voice during office visits with their care providers.
2) Prenatal Preparation – Role Play Scenarios
I believe the most effective way to prepare for communication during labor and birth is to use role play. A doula can use her experience with supporting families in labor to set up a very realistic scenario for a communication challenge role play. Mom and partner can talk through how they would use their voice in each situation and decide what would work best. There might be some situations where the partner is better at leading the conversation and others where mom should take the lead. Using role play is a wonderful way to work through possible uncomfortable and difficult situations and also help couples develop a nice working relationship with their doula.
3) Prompt a Conversation During Labor and Birth – the ‘Play Dumb’ technique
As a doula there are times when I need to remind my clients about their preferences or about a question that they want to ask. The role of a doula is not to speak for their clients, but they can prompt their clients and assist them in starting a conversation. I call this “playing dumb” and I find that it works very well.
For example, my client might want to have a conversation with the OB on call during labor about their preferences for delayed cord clamping. The OB might walk into the room and ask if they had any questions to which they reply “No”. I know that they want to discuss the clamping issue so I could say “They want delayed cord clamping!” or I could use the ‘play dumb’ technique and say to my clients “What were you saying about delaying clamping?” This question gently reminds them about the conversation that they wanted to have without actually speaking for them. They could also choose to ignore the question if they change their mind or this will actually help them get that conversation started. The ‘play dumb’ technique must be explained during the doula prenatal appointments so that they understand how it works. It is important that clients know that the doula isn’t actually forgetting their preferences, but just reminding them. From my experience, most partners love this technique.
4) Ask For Time
Many people ‘lose their voice’ when care providers are in the room. They might actually forget what they want to say (or ask) or they might be uncomfortable expressing themselves. A great technique to help in this situation is to ask for time alone. Unless it is an emergency, care providers can usually spare 3-5 minutes for mom and her partner to speak alone. During this alone time, mom and her partner can regroup and plan the questions they need to ask or develop a strategy for how they will communicate their preferences. While a doula can help during this extra time, it is important that the birthing couple also knows that they can ask for the doula to leave as well.
]]>A doula referral network is a group of professionals that are willing to refer clients to you. Creating this network takes a good amount of time and effort. However, the resulting network can ultimately create a steady stream of client inquiries and hopefully a calendar booked solid.
Every month, I see the power of a great referral source when I finish co-teaching a childbirth class. In my role, I teach a breakout session to partners. The primary teacher is a labor and delivery nurse at one of the hospitals where my clients often give birth. I have developed a great relationship with this nurse which led to this co-teaching opportunity. At the end of every childbirth class there are always several of the couples which approach me about my doula services. The relationship with that one referral partner has become so strong that I could book myself solid some months just from her referrals alone! Each of us has the power to create strong referral partners like that, but I believe that it takes a plan and a concerted effort.
You are likely a doula if you say any of the following.
What would you add to the list?
Like this list...Check out the Doula Elevator Speech
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1) Honey is a liquid
Sometimes a laboring mom is given a food restriction and limited to only liquids. This practice is not evidence based, however is still common in many areas of the world. Honeysticks are one snack that I think bridges the gap between food and liquid. They feel more like a food, but technically are liquid. They are a nice alternative to water, sports drink or broth that are often the only options when restricted to liquid.
2) Honey sticks are SUPER SNACKS
Honey sticks have all of the qualities that I look for in a perfect snack. Depending upon where you purchase your honeysticks, they are 100% natural. They usually contain no artificial colors, flavors or preservatives. {we proudly carry high quality honey sticks!} They have a great flavor without any odor. Honey sticks also can be eaten discreetly, no crunching or loud package opening noises. {a peaceful birthing environment is key!}
Honey sticks stay fresh for a LONG time. Most honey is fresh indefinitely! Occasionally it will start to crystallize. Once the honey has crystallized it is still okay to eat.
Honey sticks are portable and easy to eat. Eating a honey stick might seem tricky, but once you know the technique it’s super easy.
3) Honey sticks provide a quick shot of energy for everyone
The sugary sweetness provided by honey can be a quick shot of energy. During labor the entire team (mom, partner and doula) can often use a quick pick me up! Honeysticks are a perfect solution.
]]>I took a photo on my way to a birth recently and realized that this photo really says a lot about me.
5 things this photo says about me:
1) Doula Bumper Sticker - I love being a doula so much that I put a "DOULA" bumper sticker on my family van. I am proud to show the world that I am a doula
2) City of Atlanta - I have lived in Atlanta the vast majority of my life and I live and work here now. I attend births at most of the Atlanta area hospital, especially the ones in the city. (Parked on the deck of Emory University Midtown Hospital in the photo)
3) Top of the Parking Deck - I prefer parking on the top deck at hospital garages because it helps me remember where I have parked. I have many other habits to make the profession more routine. When you know that you might be leaving the hospital in a sleep deprived state it is good to have some routines in place.
4) Doula Bag with "Doulas Celebrate Labor Day Every Day" button - I carry a bold red backpack filled with items that I might use to help support a mom. I tell my clients that I carry most of the tools that they might need in labor. Having a filled doula bag speaks to my other job as an owner of a doula products company (YourDoulabag.com). My backpack sports a "Doulas Celebrate Labor Day Every Day" button just for fun and a little humor (both I try to bring into my doula practice).
5) Birth Ball wearing an orange floral cover - I carry a birth ball so that I know that my client will have one that is properly sized and inflated for labor. To make carrying it easier, I cover my ball with a YourDoulaBag.com orange floral cover. This cover is both practical and cute. I consider myself very practical and I can't help but want to show my personality a bit. I am not afraid to be noticed while walking into the hospital.
How do you stand out in the profession? Do you have a photo that will tell the story? Please add a comment with a link to your doula "stand out story".
]]>I would agree, however I also think that a few key items can make doula work easier and more fun too. For this reason, we have put together a 'Starter Pack'. This pack contains 9 items to get your doula bag and doula work off to a great start!
The pack is a mixture of tools for labor, snack for the laboring team, an item to show doula pride and tools for awesome client communication.
Below is a video with more information about each of the Starter Pack items and how to use them.
What are you favorite starter items for the doula bag? Please let us know in the comments!
Looking to Purchase a Starter Pack?
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Before I perfected my 'doula elevator speech' this question often resulted in a very confusing jumble of descriptions that left the person who asked the question with a puzzled look on their face. If I didn't start with an easy description that they could quickly understand I often lost them before I even got started. They tuned me out and didn't get to hear about the most amazing profession that I am so passionate about! I spent some time working on this speech and not have it down to a one-minute concise description highlighting what I feel is most important about my role as a birth doula.
I took some time and worked on this speech and now have it down to a one-minute concise description highlighting what I feel is most important about my role as a birth doula. I don't try to convince the listener to use a doula. My goal is to clearly explain the role and my job to the listener in under one minute. You can download the text of the speech here.
What Is Included in My Doula Elevator Speech
I wanted the speech to start with a comparison to something that most people understand. I think this is a great way to begin and a quick win for me! The listener gets an immediate picture of what I do.
From there I expand with details about what a doula does and I give the details that I think are most important. Doulas know that we do a lot, but I tried to use top level descriptions. I then tried to cover the most common things that people ask. This includes "Do you catch the baby?" and "Do you do medical procedures" and "Do you only work with moms that want to go natural?".
What Is Not Included in My Doula Elevator Speech
I don't mention my training, experience or background in the speech. While this information is important, I don't think it is needed to make my point. This is the type of information that I would go over during an interview or when a am speaking to someone who is interested in my personal story. I also don't mention anything about my personal opinions on tricky topics like birth choices, c-section, epidurals and circumcision.
What does your elevator speech include?
I would love to hear about how you quickly describe your job as doula. What do you include or omit? Please share in the comments below.
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This infographic is designed to get mothers-to-be and their partners thinking about the important decision. It promotes the idea of creating a plan for visitors and communicating this plan with their support team. There is no right answer to the question of whether or not to have visitors at your birth. We are merely suggesting that the decision be carefully considered and that women know that they have the right to say no to any visitor for any reason.
This infographic is available in a two page PDF file for anyone to purchase and download. We encourage doulas and childbirth educators to purchase and print copies for their clients and students. It is a great way to get this important conversation about visitors started.
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I invested in a MamAmor birthing and breastfeeding classic doll!
I finally decided to make my purchase decision when I was looking for a good teaching tool for older children expecting a sibling. I have a fetus/placenta/uterus model, but those seem a little too abstract for children. I can just hear the questions with that model. "Where does the baby come out?"
The MamAmor Birthing and Breastfeeding Doll is an excellent teaching tool for my collection and I would be remiss to not mention the beautiful quality! Tulip (my doll's given name) is wearing a gorgeous hand knit cardigan sweater and matching shoes. She has on a lovely sundress and is accessorized with a flower in her thick multicolored yarn hair. Tulip's baby is outfitted in a soft flannel diaper and matching blanket (but is usually naked because of the importance of skin to skin).
I decided to create an unboxing video to share my excitement and thrill for finally making this purchase! I hope you enjoy the video and get to really see a detailed look at this one of a kind birthing and breastfeeding doll.
What can you demonstrate with a birthing a breastfeeding doll?
I can't wait to put this doll to good use. In the meantime, my four kids are having fun with her. The baby has been named Bartholomew and has been birthed countless times! The next purchase they would like me to make is a MamAmor Puppy! Yes, the puppy gives birth too.
What are your favorite teaching tools? Please share in the comment section!
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In this seventh edition of the Doula Business Chat (#doulabizchat) we discuss client services. Many doulas offer services that are complementary to their doula services. We discuss the different services that doulas are currently being offered, brainstorm on other possible complementary services and discuss how and why we would want to add to our current practice.
Advantages of adding additional services
Most Common Complementary Services Offered
One of the doulas on video with me, Erin, brought up a great question. How does offering additional services have an impact on our Doula Code of Ethics? This is an excellent question! Each of us must evaluate this process and make sure that we are working within our scope. One thought that came from the chat box, was to create separate contracts for each of the services we offer. I also think that we need to make sure that our clients are aware of our training and certifications for all services that we offer.
Get Worksheet with 40 service ideas
Services Discussed on Video with links to training
What services do you offer? Are there trainings that you recommend? Please share in the comments!
]]>What hot topics did we miss? Please enter your ideas for a Doula Business Chat Topic in the comments of this post.
Mark your calendar for the next Doula Book Club Chat featuring the book Natural Hospital Birth. The Chat will take place on May 14th at 9pm ET.
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Just what is bloody show anyway?
Just inside the cervix lies a mass of mucous. The role of the mucous is to keep bacteria out of the uterus thereby keeping the fetus safe from infection. The mucous stays inside the body as long as the cervix stays closed and hard. As the cervix begins to thin and open the mucus can start to come out. If the mucus comes out in a mass it is called the mucus plug. If capillaries located around the cervix brake during this process the mucous can be tinged with blood. Blood tinged mucus is called BLOODY SHOW. Bloody show can vary from brown tinged (blood that is a bit older) to quite red.
When it comes out and what it means
As the cervix opens and thins bloody show often appears and will also increase in quantity. If the cervix opens quickly we can also see an increase in bloody show. For these reasons, doulas love to hear their client’s report that they have bloody show. Doulas don’t check cervical dilation, but if we hear that our client has had bloody show we have a good idea that the cervix is making some change.
Why I love bloody show
From my experience, when there is a significant amount of bloody show that usually means good cervical dilation is happening. The opposite can also be true, if a woman has no show then her cervix might be slower to dilate. Each woman is unique in the amount of bloody show that appears in labor. I'll go ahead and admit to often asking my clients as they leave the restroom "any bloody show?" or "how'd it go in there, anything interesting?"
{All women should contact their healthcare providers with any questions or concerns about bloody show or any other bleeding or discharge.}
What's your experience with bloody show?
Did you have bloody show in labor? Are you a doula that loves bloody show just like me? Please leave a comment and share your experiences!
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In our first doula book club we featured Mindful Birthing: Training the Mind, Body, and Heart for Childbirth and Beyond. Published in 2012 and written by Nancy Bardacke, CNM this book focuses on using mindful techniques for working through labor, birth and early parenting.
I chose this book after hearing about it from a few of my doula clients. I have had a little practice in mindfulness and thought that using this technique for childbirth could be such a useful technique.
On February 24th I hosted a book club to discuss this book. Below is the recording from that discussion.
The author, Nancy Bardacke, CNM is the founding director of the Mindfulness-Based Childbirth and Parenting (MBCP) program and leads a MBCP class. In the book, she gives a lot of real quotes from her students about using the practice for childbirth.
Here are a few pieces of the book that I really enjoyed:
Chapter 1 - Nancy describes the conversation that she has with all of her students before the class starts. She makes sure they are aware of the concept and style of class. This is an excellent idea. We all want to fill our classes, but isn't it more important that our students get to the class that is right for them.
p 24. The way in which Nancy describes labor is really unique and thought prvoking.
p 69. Horticultural Time vs. Industrial time is an excellent concept!
p 130-131 Nancy describes how NOT to stimulate the thinking mind of a woman in labor and why that is important. This section is a must read for all birth partners and doulas.
I really enjoyed the book and would definitely recommend it to parents interested in mindfulness and looking for more techniques to manage the challenges of pregnancy, labor, birth and parenting. I think couples that practice mindful birthing techniques will have a powerful set of tools for labor, especially those interested in natural childbirth or avoid intervention.
Thank you Nancy for putting a great resource out in the world.
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These are just 6 of the ways that doulas can support with an epidural, but there are so many more! A doula supports her clients even before labor begins with birth planning. She often meets a client at home in early labor and helps her decide when to leave for the hospital. There are so many ways in which a doula can support a mom planning an epidural. I hope the myth about doula and unmedicated births can finally be disproven!
Get Your Own PDF Download
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NOT AVAILABLE AT THIS TIME.
]]>Once a doula has experience the question of 'what to charge' never seems to go away. It is a topic that gets a lot of mentions at doula conferences and doula networking events. Do other professions have this struggle?
I have created a fee setting method that will allow you to set your fee with confidence. Join this free webinar on Sunday February 8th at 8PM ET. While I won't give you a magic number, I will give you the tools to help you determine what is right for you.
Participants will discover:
The webinar will be recorded if you can't attend, but live participants will have the ability to ask questions and get real answers!
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